Why am I the scapegoat in my family? Many of us ask ourselves this question on an ongoing basis. And while there are not usually black and white explanations for ending up in this role, there are some common possibilities.
We may be the scapegoat simply because our narcissistic parent needed one and chose us. Scapegoats may also be chosen due to things beyond their control, such as gender, birth order, appearance, personality, intelligence, or any other characteristic. Why? Because narcissists are easily intimidated and want to reduce threats to their fragile egos. We may be chosen as scapegoat simply because the narcissist feels threatened by us. Or we may remind them of something they dislike about themselves (not something they’d admit out loud, of course), or something they like about themselves and want to continue to feel that they’re superior. The goal is to keep the scapegoat held down so that they can’t outshine anyone.
So, the best answer to the question at play here is that there is no way of knowing exactly why we’re chosen as scapegoats. But one thing is for certain; whatever the reason is, it has absolutely nothing to do with us. Scapegoats are targeted by toxic people because we’re perceived as a threat. Maybe it’s about looks or accomplishments or athleticism or intelligence or…or…or…and the list goes on. But that’s not our problem. That’s their issue.
Shine, people! Don’t ever believe that you’re flawed, or not good enough, or that you’ve done something to deserve the scapegoat role you’ve been given within your family of origin. It literally has nothing to do with you. So be you, live your life to its fullest, and don’t ever dim your light for anyone.
Until next time,
Heather ~Natural Clarity Coaching~ naturalclaritycoaching.com na********************@***il.com Natural Clarity Coaching on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Twitter