Growing up, I spent hours upon hours soaking up music. As a musician from a young age, performing and listening to music of many genres was and continues to be a big deal for me. Music takes me to different spaces, carries me out of my body to ethereal locations, and provides calm and relaxation in ways that most other things don’t come close to achieving.
I didn’t realize it at the time but music (and my Grandma) literally kept me sane. Well, that and a cache of inner strength that existed deep inside me, outside of my young awareness. In fact, it was many years later, when a therapist mentioned this strength that she saw in me, that I was able to recognize it. When important people in your childhood constantly place so much emphasis on your supposed weaknesses, you don’t often look for the strengths in yourself. Music was my safe space and companion in an emotionally, and sometimes physically, unstable and hurtful home environment. This revelation came to me as an adult, long after I had left my childhood behind. When I revisit music from, say, my teenage years, I recognize what my subconscious was embracing in the lyrics. Back then, I don’t know if it truly registered because I believe I was – at a conscious level – unaware of my circumstances. When you’ve been taught that your family is “perfect”, you believe that everything is completely normal. In my case, I had been so well-conditioned to accept everything I was told (scapegoat, black sheep, etc.) that I didn’t question any of it. My thinking at the time was that if I was being given the silent treatment for days on end, for example, then I had done something to deserve it. End of story.
As an adult, music is still one of my main go-to’s. Happy, sad, upset, frustrated, bored…music is and has always been there for me. I can sit down at the piano and play whatever pieces I feel like playing. Or I can pick up my headphones and listen to whatever suits my mood. Both are very cathartic acts of self-care.
Music…I recommend that everyone should keep it in their coping toolbox. Looking back, I’m incredibly grateful for everything it helped carry me through, especially when I didn’t realize just how important it was for my sanity. I have no doubt that my intuition brought me to it for much-needed therapy and healing.
Until next time,
Heather ~Natural Clarity Coaching~ naturalclaritycoaching.com na********************@***il.com Natural Clarity Coaching on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Twitter